FUNNY JOKES

BASKETBALL CHICKEN

Q: Why did the chicken cross the basketball court? A: He heard the ref was blowing fowls.

CATFISH AND LAWYERS

Q: What’s the difference between a catfish and a lawyer? A: One’s a slimy scum-sucking bottom-dwelling scavenger; the other is a fish.

BAD LAWYER

Q: What do you call a lawyer who has gone bad? A: Senator.

AFTER YOU

‘”Have you heard my knock-knock joke?” asked the blonde. “No,” said the brunette. “Okay,” said the blonde. “You start.”

FIRST IMPRESSIONS ARE EVERYTHING

Q: What did one of the prositute’s knee say to the other? A: Nothing. They have never met.

A CLEAN IDIOT

Q: What do you call a clean idiot? A: Soap on a dope.

411

You’re so stupid that you had to call 411 to get the number for 911.

ANDREW NORELLI: WRONG TIME TO WORRY

People worry about health at the wrong times, you ever notice that? ‘Ooh, there’s a hair in my food.’ You’re eating bacon — there’s a pig’s ass in your food.

ANOTHER BULL NAME

Q: What do you call a masturbating bull? A: Beef Strokinoff.

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game.

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. “Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were […]